You Want to support Women?

How far are you willing to go?

Photo Credit: @emirshiro

The Man She Wants is a publication by Men´s Relationship Coach Franziska Zaar to awaken men to the kind of power that reshapes their relationships from the inside out.

A girlfriend of mine told me about a conversation with some men, which she liked a lot. They were very conscious and gave her hope. They said, they wanted to support women but they didn´t know how, they miss like a mannual or something. This evoke something in me..

You want to support women- but are you willing to become an empowered man?

This is a big misunderstanding in my eyes about womens empowerment and the men, who match it: it is not, that she is the boss now (she doesn´t want to be) and it is not either, that there are certain things you do for her.. and now it gets uncomfortable: it is about you stepping into your masculine power.

This is the step, that men either misunderstand as becoming an alpha asshole (a convenient misunderstanding as this type just makes the world behave to his taste, in order to not look at his own wounds and gaps) or don´t want to go there because they know it´s not gonna be comfy.

So the way to be a man, who supports women, who supports the feminine, you need to look at the things, that make you unsafe, unable to hold her in her fullness. It´s not the things you do for her per sé, it´s the things you do from your rooted masculinity. It´s the masculinity you exude, that let´s her drop into her feminine and surrender- this is something you feel as a woman. If she doesn´t, because you are not rooted in masculinity, you can do all the right things, she won´t feel supported in her feminine.

You don´t want to please her, you want to be so fucking masculine, that none of her storms impress you, there is nothing you don´t handle when thrown at you, you don´t shy away from her or from pinning her against the wall.. You want to use your masculine power to heal-fuck her and to love her so deeply, that she has no other way than believing you. If you do that, you help deliver a very happy, fulfilled woman.

If you are an understanding, women loving man, who experienced rejection by women, it´s likely, that you missed this part: the pinning against the wall, moments, where you do things you know she needs but she may not like right away. Things you consider disrespectful like stopping the argument to fuck the shit out of her because it got ridiculous (or just because), using your magic wand to open and soften her again. You probably waited for consent, you were insecure about what is ok and what isn´t and in that, you didn´t lead.

Note: I´m not saying rape her or disrespect her- I say lead. Leading is the inclusion of everyones needs into your decisions. Needs are different from wants.

So, supporting women is not a nice add on, it´s a becoming, it is empowerment. Real empowerment of the feminine is not done without real empowerment of the masculine- one cannot rise without the other. We might like it or not but the polarity of feminine and masculine grows together.

So when we say- and I said that- that there is a mismatch between men and women- it can´t really be true. We move together, and we support each other best when we empower ourselves. The state the feminine is in is the state the masculine is in.

If you want a mannual, you are up to pleasing women. The real shit is your masculine power. It`s not about an action bundle, it is about your personal evolution, always.