I write about how women feel men- the subtle dynamics, the silent impact, the moments that shape safety, desire and connection. My work guides men into deeper presence, integrity and grounded masculine leadership.
He comes home and asks her “how was your day?”- silence- she rolls her eyes and squeezes a pretended “great!!” through her teeth and leaves the room.
He doesn´t know what happened- hadn´t he asked her a nice question? Why is she pissed all the time? In his world, he is doing everything he can and everything right, but the result is not what he wants: she is nagging him, she complains all the time, gives him the silent treatment and apparently is not interested in him anymore at all. Frustrating as hell!
What he doesn´t see is that he is saying the “right” things and maybe even doing the right things, but his animal part- his body, his presence, his unconscious, his primal part- is saying something completely different.
While he entered the home and asked her how her day was, he also put his stuff away, looking at his phone and most importantly: he wasn´t actually interested in her day, he just wanted to relax in peace.
So while he thought he is doing what he´s supposed to do and what is “right”, she felt: I don´t give a shit, leave me alone.
This happens all the time because most peoples words and their animal part are not in line, they are communicating different things, contradictory things.
There is always a conversation under the conversation, meaning you not only communicate with your words, you communicate with your entire presence and the more unconscious, numb and unaware you are of yourself, the more likely you are to send different signals and create a glitch, confusion and repel her.
Or you being physically present in the room makes her feel more lonely than when she is alone instead of giving her a feeling of weight and being held. The first is you being physically there but energetically absent, the latter is you actually being present.
That´s the difference between the impact that slowly destroys your relationship and the impact that creates a frame in which she feels held, safe and loved, which will create the beautiful, loving, supportive and sexy relationship you are actually craving.
If you want to learn how to use your impact most potently, I wil show you- book a free discovery call here.